i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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