My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
