all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
Randomize