You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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