"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Randomize
