I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
