where am i from again
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
