these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Omg I joined a choir last night...
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
