I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize