absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Randomize
