so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
