Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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