I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Randomize
