i'm signing you up for texting rehab
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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