Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
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