Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
