Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
Randomize
