all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
