Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
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