Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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