I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Randomize
