Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
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