Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
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