So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Even my vagina gasped.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
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