But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
