yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
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