He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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