If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
ok first of all what the fuck
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
