Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Princesses don't give blow jobs
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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