somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
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