im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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