Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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