I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
