Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Randomize
