Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Randomize
