I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
