There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
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