Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
