woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Randomize
