He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
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