Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
