I must be too annoying 4 u.
We won't sleep together?
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
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