I only kidnapped one of them. chill
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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