im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
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