Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Randomize
