Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
