Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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