Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
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