I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
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