i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
